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A Feeling of Bliss' Journal [entries|friends|calendar]
A Feeling of Bliss

[ website | Amanda-Land ]
[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

(2 new dances | show me a new step)

[22 May 2003|12:20pm]
So very tired.

I haven't been to sleep yet since working last night. Jen was supposed to host a Mary Kay facial class this morning, and she wanted me to go along. But when I called her to make sure she was up on time, she just fell back asleep on the phone. Oh well. I have been running errands all day. Joyous and fun.

Nothing much to report, really. I chopped my hair off again yesterday. I'm reading a book called "Doctor Dogbody's Leg." Very...odd.

(4 new dances | show me a new step)

[09 Dec 2002|07:06pm]
WHITE
Pure. Innocent. Cautious.
Take the Color Personality Test here.

(9 new dances | show me a new step)

[01 Dec 2002|01:34pm]
I almost peed my pants!

(1 new dance | show me a new step)

[30 Nov 2002|06:36am]
[ mood | cranky ]

Ooooh, I'm up >b>early!</b> I have to work 7-4 for inventory today. When my alarm went off, I felt like I was going to cry...it's just...sinfully early. Yuck. And it's cold...which is nice. But cold + early rising makes me think about elementary school, and that's the furthest thing from nice that could possibly cross my mind.

Thank you for actually sending me a pic =D

As for most of the rest of you...*glare* The response was overwhelming, haha. That's okay.

What I would really like to do is crawl back under my nice, warm blankets and sleep for a couple more hours...maybe get up when it's actually daylight. What a concept.

Adios!

(1 new dance | show me a new step)

Excursions into the Infinite [29 Nov 2002|10:13pm]
[ mood | happy ]

Ah, what a lovely day!

"Emancipate yourself from mental slavery. None but ourselves can free our minds." --Bob Marley

yummy, work!Collapse )

(show me a new step)

[15 Nov 2002|02:44am]
For the most part, this quiz is pretty good...and I like my results.


What's YOUR Writing Style?

brought to you by Quizilla

But that little crack about Walt Whitman just about killed me. I hate that man's writing with a fiery passion.

(7 new dances | show me a new step)

Zen Fest Ramblings [22 Sep 2002|05:43pm]
[ mood | stark RAVING mad (wow, I'm clever) ]

*Made this entry public, because I think it's important. But the rest of my journal is friends only*

Okay, first of all, there were a lot of problems with Zen Fest. Those were expected. With the cancelation of Electric Daisy Carnival earlier in the summer, Zen was thrown into public scrutiny. We were driving down there expecting to be harassed by cops, expecting to be pulled over and searched for any minor traffic violation. It was inevitable. What was NOT expected was the sheer numbers of cops. The impersonal treatment by the promoters of Zen. The false advertisement. The overpricing of water and food.

About 10 miles in each direction of the venue, there were cops. So many, I never thought that many existed. Not just city and county cops...we had state police out there as well. And anyone that was pulled over...two cops cars a piece. It was so scary. I was shaking so bad, and I wasn't even doing anything wrong at all. I spent so much time thinking, "I don't want this party to get busted, I don't want to go to jail for dancing and wanting to have a good time." So, unlike me, I went about 5 miles UNDER the speed limit. I was NOT going to be pulled over. Not that I had anything to hide. But you know, it's the principle of the thing.

We get inside the venue. There are cops everywhere!! And to make things worse...they had riot gear. Bullet proof vests. Guns. And they stood around and stared at people, hands on guns. I mean, shit. Mace. What the fuck? The vast majority of the people out there knew that security would be tight, so they didn't bother bringing any drugs or anything. The lineup was such that drugs would not have made anything better, it was sensational in and of itself. So I would say about 75% of people there were sober.

Moving on to impersonal treatment: yes, I know that you can't go into a party expecting to be treated warmly as individuals. But you know what I DO expect? To be treated as more than just a walking ATM. All they saw was money. They didn't see people. People with their own passions and hopes and dreams...just money. Just potential revenue. That makes me sick. Where are the people who recognize that without us, there would be no party? There is a certain amount of respect you give to people who are willing to drive hours to come to your party. Out of respect for you, your talent, and your venue.

False advertisement: I did not get a VIP pass. I didn't need one. But many of my friends got them, and these were the things that were promised:
1. Free water.
2. Free food.
3. T-shirt.
4. Free CDs.
5. Meet the DJs.
6. A chill room.
What was delivered?
1. 2 bottles of warm water for each person, until they ran out.
2. A basket of rotten fruit.
3. That's...about it.

There is something to be said for general admission, methinks. VIP tickets didn't pay for themselves.

Overpricing: Hello? $3.00 for water? Fuck you.

We left around 2:30 am instead of staying until 7 when it closed. When people started getting arrested, we decided it was time to leave. But you know something? That's exactly what they wanted. When we left, I think only 2 people had been arrested. I heard the numbers got MUCH higher later on. I also heard they were doing random searches, saying they were going off "tips." That, I don't believe. We act as a family, as a unit, when we ("we" = ravers, party goers, what have you) go to a party. Tip-offs as to who has drugs? Heh. Not likely at all. And as I said before...only about 25% of people had anything to hide. What am I saying? There were plantings. That, I do not doubt.

The state of Texas is intolerant of our...MY...culture. Slowly, they are shutting us down. It's coming back to underground now, and that's good...but it's also unfortunate. I don't feel that we are doing anything wrong. I don't feel like we should have to hide and suppress our passions and way of life because some people in charge don't understand, and never thought to ask us what was going on. Do you believe what you see on CNN? Dateline? Then fuck you. Elitist bastards. Next time you want to make a generalization about me, about my culture, about my fellow ravers, then take it up with us. Get some real input. We are honest people. We don't sugarcoat the truth. Yes, there are drugs out there. Yes, there are some problems. I won't deny that, no one will. But the point is, to most of us, it's not about the drugs. It's about the music, the people, and dare I say the Peace, Love, Unity, and Respect?

(16 new dances | show me a new step)

[16 May 2002|02:00pm]
I am in dire need of a bubble bath.

(show me a new step)

[02 May 2002|01:14am]

Rock! I get to be my fave Sailor! Woo!

(41 new dances | show me a new step)

[22 Apr 2002|05:39pm]
HEY HEY...If you found me randomly, please leave me a comment - I love searching through other people's journals (nosy, nosy me) and you can never have too many LJ friends.

(7 new dances | show me a new step)

[11 Apr 2002|02:12pm]
I want this book: Wish For Something Better But tiz expensive. Maybe one of these days, I will say "screw expense!" and order it anyway. Ah well.

(3 new dances | show me a new step)

[20 Mar 2002|09:47pm]
[ mood | infuriated ]

Well, someone who reads this sent a copy of my entire livejournal to my parents. So I got confronted today with loads of rude comments from them, which, I can moderately understand, were deserved.

But what I want to know is...

Who hates me that much? Why would anyone that I consider a friend do something that shitty or that hateful? Truly, that is messed up.

Fine, if you did it, that's great. Good for you. But next time you want to do something that crappy or rude, please at least don't be such a goddamned coward and tell me who you are. Because obviously there isn't anything I can do about it, is there? You can print out my life story and send it to my parents all you want, you can rat me out, you can be a little snitch, that's fine. That's your choice. But when you do snide and petty things like that, you should consider the feelings of all the parties involved. It just isn't nice. In fact, it's cruel.

What is so awful about me that you feel the need to do this? This doesn't just hurt my feelings, it shatters them, do you understand that? It's an awful thought, to not know whom I can trust anymore. Really it is.

I spent all my life believing that you can trust everyone and that no one was really out to get anyone else. Do you realize that I can't believe that anymore? You might as well have just ripped out my soul! Because that's what I based everything on. Everything.

So I hereby extend my congratulations to you, you who have ruined all things for me. Thanks. I hope you are proud of yourself.

(show me a new step)

[10 Mar 2002|01:54pm]
tra la la

(7 new dances | show me a new step)

[10 Mar 2002|11:32am]
From here on out, this will be a friends-only journal, as I have been spied on by certain people that I thought I could trust - but obviously can't. If you wish to keep up with my life, and you are not already added my my friends list, then please comment here and I will add you. Thanks!!
--Amanda :)

(1 new dance | show me a new step)

[09 Mar 2002|04:57am]
an interesting development that threw all my beliefs off-kilter:

just click here!!

trust me on this one, your life will be forever changed...

(2 new dances | show me a new step)

[09 Mar 2002|04:03am]
[ mood | accomplished ]

How to Vacuum Midwestern State University Style:

Step One: Go downstairs to front desk.
Step Two: Ask for vacuum cleaner.
Step Three: Go BACK upstairs because you forgot to bring your ID card with you and you have to leave it at the desk in order to check out a vacuum cleaner.
Step Four: Go downstairs, weilding aforementioned ID card.
Step Five: Present ID card to person at front desk, whereupon they ask what you want, because even though it has only been 2 minutes, they don't remember what you wanted.
Step Six: Ask for vacuum cleaner...again.
Step Seven: Watch in horror as they pluck the most beat-up, ghetto vacuum cleaner in the history of mankind out from behind the desk.
Step Eight: Meekly take the "most beat-up, ghetto vacuum cleaner in the history of mankind" from the person at the front desk.
Step Nine: Haul it upstairs.
Step Ten: Plug it in, plug it in. ~*music notes*~
Step Eleven: Vacuum room.
Step Twelve: Swear at vacuum cleaner because it doesn't suck.
Step Thirteen: Angrily march the vacuum cleaner back downstairs.
Step Fourteen: Receive ID card back.
Step Fifteen: Go back upstairs.
Step Sixteen: Find roll of packing tape.
Step Seventeen: Use packing tape on the floor to pick up what the vacuum cleaner didn't...which is just about everything.

And then, at some later date, you will have to repeat steps 1-18, because the floors are mess-magnets.

*sigh*

Gee, I wonder what I have been doing...?

(show me a new step)

[09 Mar 2002|01:22am]
[ mood | amused ]

Oh please...

Like I was really going to fall asleep before 2 a.m... Har har. :) Well, about 10 pm, Ashley and Dale came back from an art review. Dale went to work, and Ashley went in to take a nap. Then she came out and was like, "Amanda, do you want to go to IHOP? Are you feeling Monopoly?"

So we went to IHOP and played Monopoly. I got my butt kicked...again... But at least this time I don't owe her anything.

Starting to think - maybe it is a good thing that Jessica didn't make it tonight - because I forgot to vacuum. And I can also clean the bathroom. Woo!!

Such an exciting time I have before me.

And away I go!

(show me a new step)

Never Think The Best [08 Mar 2002|09:44pm]
[ mood | bawling my eyes out ]

You know, just when everything seems like it is coming back together, I get the proverbial ass-raping of the decade.

I think people just declared it "Shit on Amanda Day," because I have been flamed so bad so many times today. Nothing is going right. Nothing at all.

And at times, I wonder why the fuck I keep getting over everything or finding silver linings because it's worthless, really. I need to stop trying to find things that don't exist.

But I know I can't help it; it's a curse to be an optimist. Once I find something good about today, something else is going to go wrong and bite me in the ass. That's what my track record has proved thus far. What can I do about it?

Abso-fucking-lutely nothing.

So I am just going to go to bed and hope things get better.

(1 new dance | show me a new step)

[08 Mar 2002|09:57am]
[ mood | blind hunger ]

I should go to the cafeteria and sate my demanding stomach. Tiz very tempting. But right now, I am talking to minismee and she is having premature boyfriend-withdrawals. It's funny - although on a normal day, I would not have a good laugh at her expense...oh wait. Never mind. Har har.

Today, in order to appease Mr. I Taste Like Death, I wore black. Congratulate me. I wonder if this will cancel out my yellow-wearing tendencies? Probably not.

Ah well.

I must feed myself.

Byeee

(1 new dance | show me a new step)

[08 Mar 2002|01:50am]
[ mood | happy ]

I am supposed to write about Devon. Basically because he told me to, so here goes.

Devon is a person that I know who lives in Wichita Falls, but he also lives in Fort Worth. He is also supposed to go to kickboxing with me at the Academy, but he doesn't. I have no room to complain, since I am rarely there either. Heh. Let's see, he told me he was going to hook me up with his super tall (and from the picture I saw, if it is any indication) and super gorgeous friend, but noooooo. :) Love ya anyway, Devon. I'm going to stop talking about you now :)

I CLEANED MY ROOM!!! Just for thebratling. I am so proud - it looks all organized and nice. Almost unlived in. VERY unlike me, but I am sure I will wreck it here in a few days. Well, I am pretty sleepy at the moment, so I think I will sack out and sleep.

Nitey nite!

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